The Face Reviewed

L’Oréal Blackett 13 October 2013

IN a moment of madness I applied to be on Sky Living’s new reality modelling TV competition, The Face, earlier this year.

Overall, The Face has a little more sting in its tail: a sharp, straight-talking, no nonsense and occasionally catty tail.

Doped up on the remnants of my fleeting modelling dreams and ‘you can do it’ motivational speeches from friends and family, I tried out for a chance to be mentored by the modelling legend, Naomi Campbell.

I only got to through to the regional auditions but I know it was for the best, as now, I’m happily chilling at home, eating cake and revelling in the show’s bitchy glory. And we’re only two episodes in.

At the very mention of her name, Naomi Campbell strikes, for some, admiration and to others that have ever been near her while she’s been in possession of a mobile phone, fear. Continually reminding us of her 27 years pounding the catwalks, Naomi Campbell with The Face is about to potentially transform a new model into herself. Christ.

Along with other judges or ‘team captains’, Erin O’Connor and Victoria Secret Model, Caroline Winberg, the show sees dewy skinned and gangly girls compete for a contract with Max Factor. Twelve girls live in a model house, each week a girl loses her spot on the show and there will be only one winner and... wait a minute, haven’t we seen this all before?

If I hush seductively, “you wanna to be on top”, you’d likely be reminded of another legendary supermodel, Tyra Banks and her successful TV franchise, America’s Next Top Model.

It’s an obvious TV rating battle considering the two veterans have been in a bitter modelling feud for years. One which Tyra described in an emotional face-off, saying her days walking in Naomi’s shadow were the “most difficult” times in her life. Awkward.

After what has now been ten years (Yes, 10 years!) of samey-samey ANTM episodes, that usually involve Tyra hacking off a girls 24 inch long hair and then attaching 16 inches to a girl with short hair, it’s time the show had a little ‘friendly’ competition on the airwaves.

The show is all about NaomiOverall, The Face has a little more sting in its tail: a sharp, straight-talking, no nonsense and occasionally catty tail. It’s not just a case of judging the 12 girls, it has the team captains competing against each other to have the winning team, creating beautiful, TV gold moments of unadulterated bitchiness. It sometimes inspires me to uncharacteristically holler “oh snap!” at particularly cutting bitchy moments. Where Erin remains the calm and fair negotiator and Caroline is the úber bubbly yet feisty Swedish girl next door , our Naomi Campbell is the self professed drill sergeant instructing her chosen girls to “take notes”.

Let’s not be mistaken, the show is all about Naomi.

Her every expression is entertaining. Her sideward glances are well timed disses, every toss of her hair are subtle put downs and every false exasperated sigh is a way of Naomi telling you that you are on her time. Every inch of Naomi Campbell is judging you. We’re watching a real diva in action here.

To true diva style, there are always moments for Naomi to separate herself from us mere mortals and the inexperienced baby-faced models learning the ropes: from her casually appearing out of a jet plane, to always walking out first (hands on hip), to putting on catwalk master-classes while her supposed modelling ‘equals’ look on and are made to nod politely and feign awe. Speaking of Naomi’s walk - have you ever walked into a room and rendered everyone to rapturous applause and audible gasps. No, me neither.

One dumbfounded model described it as “walking on water”. I’d say it was like a gazelle gliding across the Sahara stalking its prey - the prey being Erin and Caroline, obviously.

There’s no sugar coating in this show. If you’re shit, you’re shit. Naomi was reduced to a full blown howling cry after a model couldn’t well, walk, in the expert ‘walky-walk’ way Naomi does. Much like most reality TV shows there are moments for normal people to be humiliated for our viewing pleasure.

Besides Campbell and the soon to be known Campbell-isms, the show has some cracking girls in it. I’m talking personality wise. While we’ve seen the typical porcelain skinned, too-pretty-to-function future mannequins, I’m rooting for the eccentric posh girl who came to castings wearing an unfortunate looking Harrods wig. Go weird girl, go.

Elaine FTWEven so, from the get-go shy and awkward Bolton girl, Elaine is clearly in the running to win. She reminded Naomi Campbell of herself when she started – cueing a nostalgic look at Campbell’s first TV appearance on TVAM. We’re reminded of Naomi’s soft side, in her young, innocent and pre mobile phone throwing days. Elaine, like the other girls, is taken by Naomi’s formidable presence. “she’s like sick at it and I want to be just like her”.