Week 25: in which Sleuth is amused by a Chinese tour group (again)
Sleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week. It's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. He's several people all at once. Sometimes Sleuth even gets serious @mcrsleuth
Sleuth’s timing of the week...
MMU staff have been on strike this week in protest at proposed staff cuts. On Thursday and Friday there have been open days at the university. Would-be students have had to walk past picket lines to get into buildings made up of staff who will become their lecturers should they return. “It’s all a bit embarrassing for Malcolm Press, the Vice-Chancellor,” said one striker. “Although,” he added, “it does make you wonder what effect the strike is having. One student wandered by and asked what a picket was.”
Lick my generator...
Following last week’s indecipherable marketing email, Sleuth went along to the launch of Impossible on Wednesday, a new ‘perception challenging’ bar for the old Bar38/Purity on Peter Street, which, aptly, many other operators have found it impossible to run. In attempt to ‘make the impossible possible’, owner Aaron Mellor of Tokyo Industries has installed all the obligatory bar kit: an ‘alcoholic mist condenser’, a ‘cryogenic cocktail freezer’ and an ‘Impossibubble lickable Champagne bubble generator’, which begs the question: who wants to lick the generator?
Sleuth also thinks it sounds like a place where it could actually be impossible to simply order a pint and a pickled egg.
Architects withdraw after inspiration rumble...
Ok so Sleuth did promise to tone down his St Michael’s bashing, but following news this week that the architects had pulled out of the controversial £200m Gary Neville-fronted property scheme, Sleuth has finally worked out, after all this time, where departed architects Make drew their inspiration for those detested towers: roll top bureaus.
GMP’s new Spice deterrent works wonders...
Sleuth sees Greater Manchester Police have really ramped up their crackdown on the spread of Spice in Piccadilly Gardens. "Don't do drugs, kids, or I'll f****** eat you"
Tour guides can bear it...
Sleuth was amused that this Chinese tour group was being led by a guide with a long stick impaling a small panda bear. This was a pole of recognition to assist with keeping the group together. Sleuth wonders if Russian guides lead groups with a brown bear, Australian guides lead with a koala bear, Greenland guides lead with a polar bear, and gay guides lead with a doll of a hairy, beefy man from the Rembrandt pub. A man bear.
Weather vane of the week...
Blurred picture here of the weather vane at Manchester Grammar School depicting a master about to thrash a small child. Sleuth thinks those old teaching methods take some beating. Yes beating.
Woodcock, ma'am?
Sleuth likes to keep up with the news, so he was reading the Manchester Guardian from 1864, a mythological time when the paper still made money. He couldn’t believe the range of meats and fish on offer on Smithfield Market in what was yet to become The Craft Beard Quarter. In a column called ‘Housewife’s Corner’ prices are given for marvellous morsels of flesh such as eels, leverets, woodcocks, doves, plovers and larks. Sleuth is on a mission this weekend to find the tastiest larks in Manchester.
A lovely thing...
Sleuth was walking through Exchange Square when he came across something lovely – dozens of knitted hearts strung up from the Arndale to Zara on New Cathedral Street. They’re part of the #aheart4mcr project launched by mother of two, Beth Clarke, on Facebook, which saw knitters from across the globe - some as far as Oz and South America - knit a heart and post it to the city, in response to the horrific terror attack on Manchester Arena in May.
Passers-by are being encouraged to unpin a heart and ‘give it a home’, as a reminder of those who were lost, but also that the city remains in the thoughts of people across the world. It warmed Sleuth’s heart it did, so he took one home and hung it from the head of his wooden parakeet – makes for a natty headpiece.
Sleuth’s Litter Bin Sign Of The Week
This is on the Ashton Canal in Ancoats. Grr. Bark. Woof.
