WE all know the barriers. Lack of time, energy, money, confidence, don't know where to start, other commitments. There are hundreds of reasons why people don’t exercise, but one is much less spoken about than others - being a woman.

What do I mean by that? Let's look at some examples.

To any guys reading this: your training is neither mine nor anyone else's business, so why is my training, performance, or how I look in the ring such a big concern to you? 

Videos of people lifting weights are all over the internet, but seldom are the comments as patronising as when it's a female lifter.

Apart from comments about looks and what some men would like to ‘do with her’, they're often about her technique. Those comments are mainly from men too, and they imply that the female lifter doesn't know what she's doing, she's cheating or she's lifting too heavy for her own good.

A couple of months ago, the CrossFit lifter Lea-Ann Ellison sparked a huge debate by posting a picture of herself on Facebook lifting a weighted barbell over her head. As the picture shows, Ellison was heavily pregnant and in the caption she tells us she was due in two weeks’ time.

Lea-Ann EllisonLea-Ann Ellison

There was no end to the responses this image provoked, from both men and women. A few were positive but thousands were critical. Some said that while exercising in moderation during pregnancy is good, weight lifting is extremely irresponsible. Others went as far as to predict that she was going to lose her baby.

Since when did the average Facebook user become an expert in the biology of pregnancies, I wonder?

Let's take a look at these criticisms. First of all, the weight Ellison was lifting might look heavy to some commentators but what do they actually know about weight-lifting or Ellison's abilities? This could have been just her standard warm-up weight, although that’s not even relevant. If she felt comfortable lifting it, who are we to say that she shouldn’t?

Secondly, from the photo, her technique looks spotless. She knows what she's doing. Why should we doubt her?

'Because we're concerned', some say. Actually I think the subtext is that because she's a woman (and a pregnant woman at that), she can't look after herself, despite the advice she'll be getting from her club, coaches and doctor.

Rosi SextonRosi SextonA more recent example is that of locally-based professional MMA fighter Rosi Sexton. She has more than ten years of experience as a pro, with 17 fights under her belt, of which she has won 13. Add to that the time she spent training before turning professional and it's clear this woman knows what she’s doing.

Sexton recently debuted for the world's largest MMA promotion Ultimate Fighting Championship, and with that recognition she also gained a wave of new internet followers. After her latest fight, which she lost after three five minute rounds via unanimous decision, those followers haven't been shy in sharing their opinions on Sexton as a person, her performance as a fighter, and her poor judgement in the cage.

A lot of them think that she or her corner should have given up the fight earlier. To them it's obvious that she did more damage continuing the fight instead of quitting before the bell rang.

And there it is again - "too tough for her own good" - the assumption that a woman (and her team, who cares more about her safety than anyone else), don't know what's best for her.

Yet, when a male MMA-bout turns a bit bloody and uncomfortable to watch, what comments do we read then? Instead of asking for the fight to be stopped, more often than not they're encouraged to get even more brutal.

Rosi in the ringRosi in the ring

In a more minor way, I've experienced this attitude too.

I can't count how many times I've seen guys attempt to squat weights that are much too heavy, drop the bar behind them, try again and fail. Does anyone come to their rescue? No. Unless they're a danger to themselves or others, should anyone, other than perhaps the gym staff, step in? Not really.

However, when I squat, I often notice a little audience of men who are ready to come to my assistance if I wobble a bit. It doesn't matter if I've proved that I can manage the weight. Next lift, I'll see their concerned looks. Sometimes they've even grabbed hold of me. Complete strangers! It drives me nuts.

So I'm going to make this really simple. To any guys reading this: your training is neither mine nor anyone else's business, so why is my training, performance, or how I look in the ring such a big concern to you? Just because I'm a woman, I don't need you to be my judge or carer. Can we just agree that for future reference you focus those worries on yourself instead?

And if you're a woman affected by this attitude: take the verbal fight - say no thanks. But whatever you do, don't let it hold you back or affect your performance.

(I know I'm guilty of this myself, but at least it's a work in progress.)

Jenny has competed in both grappling and pro wrestling, around Europe and the US. She is also a qualified level 3 personal trainer with a level 3 nutrition qualification. For more information, please visit www.sjodintraining.co.uk. You can follow Jenny on Twitter @jennysjdin