BARS killed dancing. Can you remember the last time you went out and had a dance? Not a shuffle, an actual properly sweaty dance. I can; it was a wedding, and before that another wedding, before that Glastonbury - and that wasn't me, that was a more metaphysical superbeing.
Manchester needs more options later into the night
Why is this? Because nobody (for better or worse) goes out to dance anymore. We go out to stand around, look at other people standing around, make the odd comment about somebody's shoes, fall over, grab a kebab, drop kebab, fall over again, go home.
And it's all the fault of bars; the rampaging and painfully trendy stream of bars swallowing our cities, forcing us to remain stagnant, look cool, not under any circumstances make a tit of oneself. And there's nothing more guaranteed to make you look a tit than dancing. So we've stopped. Except at weddings where it's poor form to not look a tit.
In which case, the arrival of Suburbia - a properly late late-night dancing club - in Manchester city centre this weekend (in the former Avici White on Ridgefield) should be welcomed with open arms and itchy feet.
Suburbia"Manchester has hundreds of greats bars, Spinningfields... Northern Quarter.. loads," says former MLS footballer and Suburbia owner Tom Thornton-Brookes, "but nowhere amazing to finish the night."
"Say you're out on a date, or out with a few of the lads or ladies," Brookes continues, "when you're done with the bars and fancy a dance... what next? Come midnight, I'd struggle to know where to go.
"Manchester needs more options later into the night, and what we've built in Hale is perfect for the city centre: great cocktails, girls dancing, guys trying to dance - it's a timeless formula."
Brookes speaks a good game, you have to give him that. Still, the Hale-based club - originally opened by Living Ventures (Manchester House, Alchemist) in 2009 and offloaded to Brookes and his investors last year - has a flashy reputation; big watches, bigger chests and even bigger egos.
"Listen," says Brookes, with the look of a man who knew it was coming. "I don't care if you're a builder, a solicitor or a multi-millionaire footballer, as long as you're a nice person and you're coming to enjoy yourself and respect the place, then you're more than welcome."
And got a few quid, you'd imagine. Well no actually, entry is free before 11pm, beers are around £4, cocktails start from £7 and bottles of wine from £20. Spinningphiles will recognise French & Pornstar Martinis and Alchemist's famous Smokey Old Fashioned. "I'll be honest," admits Brookes, "being formerly owned by Living Ventures, we've taken a lot of their cocktails, we've brought all the classics and the big sellers with us."
Owner Tom Thornton-BrookesBrookes and his investors have dropped close to £400k on the fit-out for the 350-capactiy venue, and it shows; clean, dark wooden lines with soft, warm leathers and a hefty dancefloor - it's a handsome design, inspired by Brooke's years working in New York and delivered by his wife, Sarha.
"The focus here is the dancefloor," she says, "we're all about coming and having a dance, not standing still at a bar wishing you could have a dance."
Time to look a tit, folks. About time too...
Suburbia will open on Ridgefield (opposite Grill on the Alley) to the public from Saturday 28 June.
Thurs 9pm-2am, Fri & Sat 10pm-4am.
(photo credits: Kim Jensen)
