Load Of Bollekes In Antwerp

FASHION and diamonds, waffles and ales – Antwerp’s a heady mix even before its surreal side creeps up on you. And it will. Just let it. Rubens and Bruegel, the gabled Grote Markt and the soaring Flemish Gothic cathedral offer you art and architecture with a Capital A, but don’t neglect the hard-nosed quirkiness that also stalks this town, so perfect for an offbeat weekend break

'Decidedly unlight are the alternatives to waffles and doughnuts – smoutebollen, or deep-fried lard balls'

Step into the workshop of self-styled “Shock-o-latier” Dominique Persoone and ask for one of his chocolate shooters, which catapult finely ground dust of of exotically flavoured cocoa up your nose. No sniggers when you learn they were first commissioned by the wives of Ronnie Wood and Charlie Watts for a surprise birthday party for their Rolling Stone husbands.

Dominique Persoone, chocolate maker with a surreal bent

"Instead of putting chocolate on the dish, because they were the rock 'n' roll grandpas, we thought they should sniff the chocolate and to get a good result we designed a machine for that," says maverick Dominique. "We just made one for that party, but then everybody talked about it in the newspapers, so then we had to make it commercial because everybody was asking for it."

My companion took the full whoosh of a ginger flavoured shooter, while I suffered the lingering torment of sucking on a wasabi suffused truffle. Heston Blumenthal is a fan. I can see why.

Wasabi flavoured choc and other treats; below it's a shrine

The Paris-trained chef with a “chocolate is rock and roll” tattoo on his right bicep set up his first shop in his native Bruges (www.dominiquepersoone.be); the Antwerp offshoot, utilising the finest South American source materials, is inside the splendid 18th century mansion called the Palais op de Meir (Meir is the main shopping drag between the imposing, gilt-encrusted Centraal Station and the Old Town).

Central Station and, below, the start of the Meir

The Palais once belonged to Napoleon, so our Flemish Willy Wonka created a chocolate in homage in the shape of a bicorne hat, filled with marzipan, cherry liquor and bitter banana cream.

Waffle With bananas and Tripel Ale; below, did you say woggle or waffle?

A sweet alternative is the waffle and doyen of these in a city that likes to snack is Desire de Lille (www.desiredelille.be)on Schrijnwerkerstraat (easier to pronounce than spell, it means Blacksmith Street). Desire’s HQ has a decided 1930s feel about it. Pass through to the glass pergola at the back where carp-teeming pools give it a lightly oriental garden feel. Decidedly unlight are the alternatives to waffles and doughnuts – smoutebollen, or deep-fried lard balls. Good ballast, as they say.

Geuze, classic Belgian beer, not for the faint-hearted

Just the thing before running the considerable gamut of celebrated Belgian beer styles – immensely drinkable, deceptively strong, Duval, various Trappiste ales such as Westmalle, Orval and Chimay and the sour, challenging Geuzes and Lambics, their grip sometimes softened by fruit in variants such as Kriek (cherry).

Het Elfde Gebod with Cathedral behind; below, the bar's holy wacky interior

Step into the kitschfest that is Het Elfde Gebod, on Torfbrug, more a shrine to monkish merriment than your average beer bar, and order the local De Koninck. “Ah, you want a bolleke,” the waitress tells you. That’s the local globe-shaped glass it comes in. It's pronounced Bollocky. That’s what you ask for here and in more classic “brown” long bars like Den Engel, centre of the Antwerp convivial universe with a view across the Grote Markt of the 400ft lacy spire of the Onze Lieve Vrouwekathedraal (Our Lady’s Cathedral).

Soaring Cathedral interior; below, Rubens' Descent From The Cross

This light-filled Gothic leviathan houses the pinnacle of resident genius Rubens’ devotional works, but before you make the pilgrimage across the cobbles to worship the sublime “Descent from The Cross” and three other masterpieces, stop off at the statue of Brabo in front of the town hall (Stadhuis) 

Statue of Brabo, hero of Antwerp, outside the Town Hall

Brabo? Verdigris coated nude chucking a severed hand, like some deranged baseball pitcher shedding his mitt. Symbol of the city. Antwerp translates as hand throwing in Dutch. Legend has a giant (or heavily-built entrepreneur) called Druon Antigon who lopped off the hand of any sailor unable or unwilling to pay the toll to sail on the River Scheldt. He was finally defeated and had his own hand detached by the Roman, Silvious Brabo, who then became the Duke of Brabant.

The MAS, groundbreaking museum by the Docks, which still keep a rougher edge

The hand symbol is all over a new riverside museum exploring the city’s past, ethnography  and many big issues (Life and Death anyone?). Oh and check out the luminously disorienting Matrix room! Yes we’re back with quirky. The MAS, (Museum van de Stroom) is a striking new building resembling a pile of rusty red horizontal box files.

Offering panoramic views of the city, it is the centrepiece of the Het Eilandje district, regenerating the old docks, Bonapartedok and Willemdok. The nearby Red Star Line Museum, tracing the exodus of 2 million emigrants across the Atlantic on the company’s steamers, opens in September 2013.

Classy eating options are already in place. The dockside Het Pomphuis was completed in 1920 as one of the largest pumping stations in Europe. All this industrial heritage is the backdrop to the restaurant’s culinary aspirations (with Pacific Rim and Asian influences, www.hetpomphuis.be).

Utterly delicious beef carpaccio at Lux

It is the food that is quietly spectacular at Lux (www.luxantwerp.com) around the corner in Adriaan Brouwerstraat. Fabulous carpaccio and fish dishes alongside Belgian traditional specialities such as Waterzooi, a rich creamy stew featuring chicken and eggs.

Rubens' bedroom; below, not impressed by the young Van Dyck

After the Cathedral, a craving for art having overtaken one for waffles and a swift bolleke, I’d recommend visiting the much-restored Rubenshuis. It’s not crammed with his works (though don’t miss a fascinating self-portrait of 1630), but it is an atmospheric introduction to a hugely successful as well as great artist, who spent much of his life in Antwerp.

Mad Meg, nightmarish masterpiece by Bruegel bought for a song

A generation before, Pieter Bruegel the Elder also spent a period living in the city. His Dulle Griet (Mad Meg) from 1562 is a nightmarish Hieronymous Bosch like allegory depicting a peasant who leads an army of women to pillage Hell. It was discovered at an auction in 1897 and bought for a minimal sum by a young collector called Fritz Mayer van den Bergh. Four years later he was dead and his mother built a gallery to house Meg and the rest of his 1,000 artworks, mostly from the Northern Renaissance. Just south of the Grote Markt on Lange Gasthuisstraat, it is a gem of a place. I had it to  myself visiting the city’s Sunday street markets.

Not far away, in the Vrijdagmarkt square, is the Plantin-Moretus Museum, a well-preserved building, which in the 16th century housed 22 printing presses and was a magnet for dissident intellectuals. Alongside old presses, the museum contains many printed treasures including Mercator maps and a Gothenburg bible. Afterwards, just wander alleys that have remained from medieval times to get a feel for the city of Rubens, Bruegel and printer Plantin.

Tribal mask on The MAS's ethnographical level

I’d like to say I got round to exploring the diamond quarter (it’s superficially drab and was closed for the weekend) and the fashion quarter – I kept discovering fashionable new beers and genevers (gins)instead – but I am assured Antwerp is a place to come for affordability and individual chic. The Tourism Information folk can supply an Antwerp fashion map

There’s so much to occupy your entire weekend without leaving the Old Town, but we did venture, via Tram Route 8 from Groenplaats, to the increasingly trendy South Side of the city, where a clutch of new museums complement the outstanding Royal Museum of Fine Arts, which unfortunately is shut for renovation until the end of 2017.

Antwerp Law Courts – bold addition to the city's architecture

We gawped at the spiky new Law Courts complex designed by Richard Rogers before visiting the old De Koninck brewery for a final bolleke of the visit (and much Duvel and Kriek, too) in a cheese matching event organised by the best cheese affineur (maturer) in town and in Europe according the Wall Street Journal  – Van Tricht (www.kaasmeestervantricht.be). Their cheese shop in Fruithoflaan is well worth a visit... but even a few nibbles do raise a thirst.

Cheers! Santé! Or as they say in Flemish: Op uw gezondheid!

Corsendonk – well-balanced beer; below, more madcap Belgian humour