SleuthSleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week, it's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. He's several people all at once. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to publish. Sleuth sometimes even gets serious. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows. Follow Sleuth on twitter @mcrsleuth
DAVID CAMERON AT ALBERT’S CHOP HOUSE
Sleuth hears that Prime Minister David Cameron dined at Albert’s Chop House on Thursday after some Northern boosterism in the afternoon (click here). He ate a starter of ‘Smoked Red Herring with a mild Liberal Sauce a la Nick Clegg’ (specially prepared by students working extra hours due to crushing tuition fees). His main was an ‘Edmillibean Burger’ that came without any relish at all, lacked credibility, and was topped with difficult to digest bacon. The Prime Minister finished the meal with an 'Eton Mess' to make him feel at home. He washed the meal down with a pint of bitter, a '100% Farage' from the USIP Piss-up-in-a-Brewery, which despite numerous gaffes in its production remains surprisingly popular. Prime Minister David Cameron insisted he only dine with Green Party members as he didn’t want to talk to any other political party.
@chophouseAlbert had the great visit of David Cameron. Must be proud @chophouseRog pic.twitter.com/nYtsaUcPKF
— Jcarlos (@jcssantacruz) January 8, 2015
ARTISAN CINEBAR & CRAZY NUMBERS...
Sleuth always knew Artisan - Living Ventures 12,000 sq ft warehouse of a restaurant in Spinningfields - had a high table turnover. But not this high. Sleuth's LV pal told him this week that in December the restaurant served 10,062 punters (not including bar customers) which, the pal reckoned, made it the 'busiest restaurant anywhere in Manchester and the busiest restaurant outside of London'. 335 covers a day will be tough to top. It was December, mind.
To capitalize and pull more passing punters in, Sleuth is told that building work on Artisan phase two will finally start later this month with eyes on a March 2015 opening. Sleuth hears there'll be another main ground floor bar with outside drinking terrace running up the ginnel (which Sleuth's sure will please Neighbourhood) and an all-new cinebar upstairs with yet another small bar linked to the Artisan restaurant by the second overhead passage. Multiple bars, dining and a cinema? Sleuth reckons all they need now is a Waxy O'Connor's and we've got ourselves a Spinningfields Printworks.
Artisan
POUND PUB FOR SALFORD?
Sleuth found a shiny pound under his desk this week. “I’ll have that,” said Sleuth's colleague L’Oréal, swiping the quid. She was off to the Pound Pub in Atherton near Wigan, you see. It opened in May last year and drummed up a bit of controversy as the first dirt-cheap poundshop boozer in the North West. Here you can buy half a pint for a quid, a full pint for £1.50 and get bladdered for under a tenner. Vice magazine described the pub as the ‘lovechild of a miserable one-night stand between EasyJet (everything was orange) and Poundland (everything was cheap)’. Good line that. Sleuth heard rumours this week that Pound Pub owners have set their sights on Eccles next. Handy, thought Sleuth, who needs an ATM when you only need stick your hand down the side of the sofa for a night out in Salford.
Sleuth doesn't fancy getting stabbed in the happy sacks, mind.
Pound Pub
THE BBC'S MOST POINTLESS INTERVIEW OF THE WEEK
So Radio 4 had Manchester chef Mary-Ellen McTague in discussion with celebrity chef Yotam Ottolenghi this week. This was because Ottolenghi’s cookbook has sold far more in London than the rest of the country. “I’m not sure why it’s not sold as well in the North,” said McTague sounding confused as to the whole premise of the interview. “I don’t know why either,” said Ottolenghi, “although all my restaurants are in London and nowhere else.” Ah right, yep, there we go, that would be the reason, no need for the Radio 4 piece trying to make a big deal of sophisticated south east versus stupid rest of the country - all sorted in one sentence. Next week: Radio 4 debates why people in London tend to shop more frequently in high-class London department store Harrods than Northerners who live 200 miles away.
Ottolenghi's food in a London restaurant that's not in the North
TEXTURE - JUST FEEL IT, YEAH?
Sleuth was in the Northern Quarter when he heard a voice. “Texture, coming soon, feel it,” it whispered. Sleuth felt a sudden urge to buy some perfume. That was back in 2014 when Confidential broke news that ‘bar-meets-nightclub-meets-fashion events space’ was to open up on Lever Street – it’s due to open early this year.
Sleuth's been warned that 'Shoreditch-style' is about to descend on Manchester. Though manager Kirk Paten assured Confidential the new bar was to be ‘pretension-free’, then passed Sleuth a drink containing Japanese Kangen water ice cubes which 'converts acidity in the body to alkalinity while providing superior hydration'...
SLEUTH'S HUGE FOOD NEWS
Sleuth was in Chorlton ironing his turnips and sprucing up his kumquats when he saw a poster announcing a new pizzeria called Double Zero on Barlow Moor Road that will feature a 'wood burning oven' and 'authentic Neapolitan pizzas'. Sleuth in a jiffy realised there was literally nothing else to say about this wonderful news, so quick as a flash, he decided to look up anagrams for the word pizza. The best one was 'zazip'. Sleuth so wishes a Zaziperia was opening instead.
New Zazipera for Chorlton
'CHEAPEST SLAG IN MANCHESTER'
Sleuth popped into Under New Management (former-Corridor bar), the find-it-if-you-can cocktail bar hiding just over the Irwell in Salford. Looking at the beer menu, Sleuth was surprised to see 'SLAG's going for only £3.50. "It's the cheapest SLAG you'll find around these parts," said the bartender for the 73rd time that month. SLAG is a 5% Belgian pils beer with impressive head, a slightly orange hue and an abrupt finish.
Oo'er
