Sleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week, it's the truth, but Sleuth's twisted truth. He's several people all at once. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to publish. Sleuth sometimes even gets serious. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows. Follow Sleuth on twitter @Sleuth
Siri Technology Fails Internet Love
Sleuth has Siri on his iPhone, the app that's being advertised on TV where you ask questions of your device and it replies. It's useless for Sleuth as it doesn't understand his accent. It can get worse than that though.
A geek loving friend was telling Sleuth how suddenly finding himself single he tried out internet dating. He met up with a girl called Carol in a bar and was getting along wonderfully, liked her a lot. In a fit of geek madness he decided to demonstrate Siri. "So what's in the diary tomorrow?" he asked Siri. "Tomorrow," said the robot voice, "you are taking Emma out on a date to the Northern Quarter."
Manchester City All The Rage
So Sleuth was out with 28 Finnish ladies this week all wearing yellow carnations ao they could identify each other. They were a bit interested in the history of Manchester but mainly interested in the shopping. All the usual stuff, best indie shops, big department stores and of course souvenirs for the kids and the menfolk of football shirts and such gumpf.
"So you'll want to know where to pick up Manchester United stuff then," said Sleuth because that's all ever foreign tourists want to buy. "No," said around eleven of the ladies, "Manchester City please." "Anybody for United?" asked a baffled Sleuth. Shakes of the head all round. "You're a fickle bunch, aren't you?" said Sleuth thinking, wow, anecdotal evidence of the rise and rise of the Blue Moon just days from Aguero's net rippling strike.
Finnish ladies with luggage to fill City memorabilia
Single Espresso Macchiato Mancini
So Lucy Photographer was remembering working in Caffe Nero on Piccadilly close to the Malmaison when City manager Roberto Mancini first came over. City would spend pre-match sleepovers at the Mal before home games. Apparently Roberto Mancini always nipped over the road in the morning to buy a single expresso macciato. Always the same drink - it's apparently the secret of his 'focus' as sportspeople say. Or maybe he just had a massive hangover from raiding the mini-bar all night.
Macchiato Mancini
Manchester Park Staff Prove the Cliche
Some of the Oswald Road footy teams in south Manchester still had games to play in their leagues. But when one of the kids' teams turned up to play Wilmslow at Chorlton Park they had a surprise. They had to throw the game and award the points to Wilmslow because there was something missing at their home pitch. Manchester parkies had taken down the goalposts that were supposed to stay up until the end of May. "Maybe they've been sold off as part of council cuts," said one disgruntled coach, before adding, "Now I understand the expression 'moving the goalposts'."
Sleuth's Sign Of The Salford University Times
Sleuth is always meeting up with young people doing Salford University's journalism course. He never fails to pass on bad advice. This week news from the course, based at MediaCityUK, reversed things and left Sleuth lifting his hat and scratching his head. Apparently the modules on the course have been altered. Magazine writing has been ditched and war reporting is being offered instead. Sleuth hopes this isn't in response to some atitudes of BBC staff concerning their move to MediaCityUK.
Sleuth's Most Famous Error In City Navigation
Dear Drivers, there are some bollards outside Marks & Spencer that rise when the free buses have gone through to prevent cars accessing Cross Street during daytime shopping hours. These have been there for many years. They were installed in Roman times it's believed and yet many of you seem to not be aware of this fact. So here's another picture from this week of what happens should you try to follow said free bus. You are impaled publicly. People come along and laugh. They take pictures on phones. They send them to Sleuth. Who puts them up on Manchester Confidential. You should especially not do this if you're in a police car as shown below. Then it's even funnier. Yours, as ever...
It's happened again
Sleuth's Lies To Tell Tourists
Carlos Tevez, looking down from the Manchester City victory parade bus, was astonished to find that there were more than two restaurants in Manchester.
