Cowes – But Not The Hot Yachty Totty

YOU don’t have to know your spinnakers from your halliards to race a yacht at Cowes – but it helps.

For landlubbers seeking a thrilling seafaring experience that doesn’t cost an arm and a sea leg, a race in a regatta takes some beating. 

Whether it’s among the cream of Cowes Week or a ‘taster’ sailing day, your very own Sunsail skipper will soon teach you the ropes.

Colourful Cowes

The Solent, that narrow stretch between the Isle of Wight and the mainland, is an ideal nautical playground. And sailing has to be one of the few sports where seafaring virgins can compete on equal footing in races with experienced sailors. Although the top end America Cup-style racing is dominated by the wealthy our Cowes Week  experience proved it’s not a snobby, exclusive or expensive sport.

Cowes likes to think of itself as the last bastion of posh, above Ascot and Henley, with lots of hot yachty totty and red trousers in evidence. The question on all the gels’ lips is: ‘how big is yours?’  I think they mean a yacht.

For the boatless there are after race parties, live music concerts and a fireworks extravaganza. The mandatory race preparation includes an evening of Pimm’s, discovering the town’s vibrant nightlife and a seasickness-defying breakfast of bacon and banger butties.

Orca training for Cowes

We have a thorough safety briefing which reassures us that fire, which would melt the boat, is rare. And if someone carelessly goes overboard, just chuck a horseshoe buoy. Being hit by the boom would seriously spoil you’re your day, so we become instantly adept at ducking if not diving.

We fasten lifejackets as skipper Dave Price plots a race route between beacons and assigns duties. I am on mainsail duty. Winching. I think not. I’m not fast or upper-body strong enough, so end up dangling my legs over the side and hanging onto the rail as we pitch at ridiculous angles, one moment getting bottom soaked in the waves, the next enjoying a full-frontal salt spray. Most invigorating. (You don’t need to splurge out on all the gear, as waterproofs are part of the package.)

Taking a breather on Aberdeen 1

Among the crew of 11 there are at least half a dozen wannabe skippers all ready to put their oar in, to mix my nautical metaphors. But mutiny is not an option.

We practise tacking, zigzagging to take advantage of every last puff of wind. Adrenaline pumps as the starting gun booms out and we jockey for position. It’s amazing how close we can sail to other craft without a crunch. It’s a marine version of playing chicken. We overtake a few, taking their wind, but there are no podium places.

But for the amateur sailor it’s a breathtaking experience: multi-coloured sails billowing under blue skies and scudding white clouds, yachts skimming green seas glinting in summer sunshine, craft at impossible angles as they bounce over foaming waves.

It’s as busy as the M25 at rush hour, and still the Southampton-Cowes ferries ply the shipping lanes, juggernauts among the minis darting out of their unstoppable way. The Red Funnel foot passenger service that had sped me from Southampton to Cowes in 22 minutes looked a whole lot bigger from our 40ft boat so we give her a wide berth.

The skipper keeps an eagle eye on the tide, the depth, the speed as we approach the Elephant Boatyard beacon, the last marker before the finishing line.

Busy schedule for the Cazenove Dynamic

In our "Sunsail F40" class we come 30th of 35 yachts, clocking 3hrs 16mins 22secs  – about 22 mins. behind the first yacht on a 25 mile course.

The only time the skipper has to employ the boat hook is to retrieve my sandal as I step onto the pontoon in a post-race rush to join the Pimm’s queue.