Pictures by Angie Sammons
THE well oiled London PR machine of McDonald’s is becoming well versed in toing and froing up and down the British motorways, of late, as it rolls out, nationally, its new Signature Collection.
It's largely what we already know from McDonald's: dependable; no real uncertainties; same taste. No unpleasant squirts.
However it might have been a little taken aback when it was parachuted into Liverpool’s very own Kensington yesterday.
Both it and its west London namesake function like any other high street. Each caters to local demand. Down south, the affluent capital version of Maccy Dees is flanked by a Lloyd’s Bank, an Ann Summers and at least three upmarket shoe stores: Ecco, Geox and Clarke’s.
Back in the ‘Pool, it is no different. Ronald’s near neighbours are a Lidl, a Payday loan shop, a Polish deli and a hairdresser called God Bless Hair. A pharmacy, dispensing balms to the walking wounded on the proverbial Streets of Kenny, is named, not inappropritely, Bounce Chemist.
Kensington, not Kensington But McDonald’s is a great leveller and once inside the store (“Everyone, we have to leave at 3pm to get to Openshaw,” Sophie, or was it Lucy, tells the team) none of this matters. Everyone is smiling and, on the face of it, at ease.
For McDonald’s is dependable, there are few uncertainties: your Egg McMuffin is the same in New York, London, Paris, Munich and indeed, in Kensington and Kenny. “Just don’t look out of the window,” chortles one management type, arriving at the "joke" after a seven second delay.
We have been chauffeured into Kensington to try out three “premium” burgers that have been at least two years in development. The Signature Range is the Golden Arches’ answer to US interlopers like Five Guys and Shake Shack who have moved into British waters for a stack of the fast food burger action. They sell fat, juicy burgers that make a big American mess and are loved by big American people.
This...McDonald's response features a thicker than usual beef patty, 2cm, made from the same forequarter and flank cuts that go into every other burger it does. It has a 20pc fat content for flavour. Burger purists would go up to 40pc, but you can see how that would go down in certain sectors of the nanny state.
To illustrate provenance, an entire table, roped off from the public, is groaning with vacuum packed cuts of appetisingly marbled British and Irish beef, which would cause Morrissey to faint. There is a hunk of cheddar the size of El Capitan, tumbling red peppers, fresh chillies and a piece of pork belly that produces the Beechwood bacon topping. All this eventually ends up in their “three great new flavours” - The Classic, The BBQ and The Spicy, all self explanatory and each served, obviously, in a brioche-style bun.
...to thisThe big guns are here. Duncan Cruttenden, Food Development Director at McDonald’s UK and Paul Coath who heads up the McDonald's "Chefs Council". They are joined by franchisee Mark who lives "quite close to Liverpool" - Knutsford - and who also has Huyton, Rice Lane and Bootle in his realm. He has spent over £200,000 for the purchase and kitchen fit out of the special grill required to produce the made-to-order Signature burger which is made to order. Then there was another £25,000 to train the staff to prepare and serve it. Special smart black boxes, special smart black uniforms.
"You take these sort of investments with a 20-year view," he says. And in that time the whole country will have them.
Focus groups, says Duncan, were used to glean customer insight. They wanted a thicker beef burger, high quality ingredients and something freshly prepared. "They wanted a wholesome meal and this is it," he declares.
The Spicy, Kensington's most popular variety, is marked out by pickled jalapeno chillies giving the mildest of heat. But it can be customised. Have a whole heap of chillies in there if you want. Or red onions. Whatever. Just have to say so at the touch screen kiosk on the way in.
But only up to a point. If you want your burger anything other than well done - like, say, medium rare - you are out of luck.
McDonald's "rules and regulations" don't allow for that sort of thing. Duncan frowns. Don't even ask.
Big guns: Duncan Cruttenden, Food Development Director at McDonald's UK, in Liverpool
In the event, the burger itself does have an inviting seared outer crust and it all hangs together rather well. Otherwise it's largely what we already know from McDonald's: dependable; no real uncertainties; same taste. No unpleasant squirts.
"Why don't you just make this the new Big Mac and be done with it?" I wonder aloud of Team McDonald's as they pack up for the delights of Openshaw. Maybe that's the 20 year view. No one is saying.
What do I know? On the way out I notice three shiny and perfect burger specimens on display in the roped off area.
I am absolutely convinced they are squeaky dog-toys. I say so. Everyone smiles politely.
*Signature burgers, £4.89, available at McDonald's Kensington, L6, and Lord Street, L1.
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