Where's the Beef: Delifonseca Double Down Dirty Daddy

Where IS the beef?
Delifonseca, 12 Stanley Street, Liverpool 2. 0151 255 0808.

What's your beef?
Introducing the Delifonseca Double Down Dirty Daddy.

How much?
Seventeen of your English pounds - or 5p short of anyway.

£16.95! Talk about Daddy's sauce.
Admittedly, it's not the cheapest burger in Liverpool.

Is there one more expensive?
It's a struggle to find one, even in London, but apparently that's not stopped people ordering it. And you do get some chips.

Remind me why is this termed filthy food? Isn't it just supersized junk food?
Please, it's gourmet junk food.

It became trendy in The Smoke a couple of years ago when Meat Liquor thrilled the upper middle classes who wanted to eat like common people. Some even have posh-filth ironic names like Gang Bang and Randy – the burgers that is.

Last year, Almost Famous Burgers led the way in Manchester and finally, filthy food, dirty food, or porn food, as it is dubbed, has hit the end of the branch line at Lime Street. Orgasmic gastro-cheer went up among the local chatterati last November when Liverpool Confidential announced that AFB would be opening up in Seel Street this spring.

Elsewhere, the backlash for the fashion is well under way with meeja London eyes tiring of their bit of rough. Here, howerer...

 ...We've only just begun
As Karen Carpenter might have said.

Oh come on, Karen Carpenter would never have eaten one of these.
Perhaps not, but there are plenty of queuing beardies making up the huge fanbase of dirty burgery.

Meat-heads?
A while back, Delifonseca took all its regular burgers off the menu because, apparently, people were sampling nowt else from its wonderful and varied repertoire. 

It replaced them all with this one Whopper Whopper Whopper Whopper Whopper: AKA the "5D Burger", saying that if an individual really wants a burger, then they'll be prepared put their money where their mouth is.

Another approach to the Delifonseca 5D Burger

A bull market?
Apparently, when people see one coming out of the kitchen, the room stops in awe. Then it's like the Pamplona bull run, but in reverse, as those who think they're hard enough rush to order.

They've even had punters taking one home, for solo meat sweats later.

Ignoring the price tag, how does it stack up?
The 5D is made up of two succulent 5oz beef patties, cooked juicy medium rare here, and spiced up with cumin and coriander, among many other things. Holding together well, they snuggle up to two generous layers of tender pastrami, two more of well judged comte cheese, a slice of onion, two superfluous beef tomato slices, Marie Rose sauce and rocket.

It's Build A Better Burger on a wooden board and all teeters at close on 10 inches tall. If you can guess the actual size to the nearest mm, you might get it free.

10 inches? You're not coming near me with that
It's a bloke thing.

The nitty gritty: Lots of pastrami, lots...

Quick, it's here. Open wide
You'd never get this all into your mouth in one go, so it's the old dilemma: do you cut into this leaning tower of burger daintily, with a knife and fork, or lunge at it, baring your teeth. In the end our operative divided it in two and tried picking up the separate halves, which proved extremely messy and lots of tissues came into play.

Neither slice of bun was up to the job and disintergrated under the weight of the components.

Nevertheless, if you like that kind of man v food thing, tuck in. 

On the side?
It has to be said, more delicious cheesy chips you will find nowhere, and some lightly dressed leaves offered respite as it all came crashing down. A bit like our bank balance.

Well burger me!
Once again, if you like that kind of thing...

7/10